Dear Birth Mother,

To the mother of my child,

Last night was one of those nights when sleep wouldn’t come to me. I sat awake, wondering how to write this letter to you. I’ve read many of these letters. They all echo my feelings. They speak of Gratitude. Honor. Love. (All are things I feel for you.) The letters speak of Security, Peace, Hope. (All things I want to give you.)

And yet somehow I want you to know more. I want you to know that I think of our paths; yours and mine; the mothers of this child. I wonder how we’ll eventually meet and how we’ll change each other for the better.

I make myself crazy thinking of things I don’t know. Who you are, where you are, when you’ll find us, how you’ll find us, why you haven’t found us yet. But amidst the uncertainty there are important things I do know.

I do know that this child needs all of us.

I wonder on all of the things you’ll give our baby; things I couldn’t give. A physical body- perfect little fingers- perfect little toes. And what of my child's spirit will be you? What talents do you have that our child will have? Will the first smile at me echo your smile? Our baby needs everything you have given. From your DNA, to the warm home you give now in your body. So much of this baby will be you and I’m excited for our baby to have those things I couldn’t give. Our baby always know of you.

And me. What will I give? It’s one of the deepest questions every mother has about her children. The basics, certainly: home, nourishment, lessons, education. But those are not the best things I will give. I promise Butterfly kisses at bedtime. My hands to hold a sick baby. Family vacations in a Coleman camper one year and Broadway plays in New York City the next. NBA Games. A home that values reading, education and thinking for yourself. Holiday Traditions and service projects. Watching thunderstorms on the porch while eating popsicles. Daily belly laughs. A firm foundation that God knows and loves this precious child. Grandparents, Uncles, Aunts, Cousins. Two sisters as built-in best friends. And, one thing every child deserves: the love of two committed parents. A mother and a father (the man I married nearly a decade ago). I will give to this baby a family. These things are the best I have to offer…

I also know that this baby, our baby, is not a mistake. He or She belongs to God, to you, to me. Our Father in Heaven knows and loves this baby and has given you wisdom to make this heart-wrenching choice. He has provided a way for you to take this detour in your life and turn it into the most beautiful act of service and kindness; a detour that will put you on a better, higher road.

Who are you? Where are you? I love you. I pray for you and for our child. I hope our paths cross soon. And when they do, it will be no accident, for you were always meant to be the woman who brought my child to me and I could never repay you. Until we meet, I’ll think of you and our baby- in the stillness of night when I should be asleep. And hope that somewhere as you cradle our baby in your belly, you’re thinking of me too.

All my Love,
Christie

Please email us!
csgdcg@gmail.com

PICK US: The top 10 reasons...

1. We love God. We will give this baby every opportunity to know and love God. They will know who they are, where they come from and where they are going.

2. We are WAY less than perfect! We don't expect people to be perfect, least of all our children. Our child will grow up in an environment where it is safe to make mistakes and where they will have the opportunity to be better every day.
3. We believe STRONGLY in education. Our children will have every opportunity that we can possibly give them that will stretch their minds. They will have the chance to go to college and be supported in their career paths.

4. We see no reason to cut you out of the picture. We don't see this baby as something that belongs to us. We know that our children belong to God and that they are on loan to us. So they belong to ALL of us. To God. To you. To us. We hope so much that you will want to be a part of our lives in whatever way we all (including you) decide is best for the baby.
5. We believe in talents! We think that our children's talents need to be highlighted and encouraged. We provide lessons to our children to help them in their goals. Our girls have taken: soccer, piano, dance, musical theater, gymnastics, swimming, art and basketball lessons. When they eventually find the thing they like, we encourage them and support them in achieving excellence.

6. Travel! We love to travel. Our children will always have opportunities to learn and grow individually and as a family through travel. Some of our favorites include: Camping trips in our camper, the Oregon Coast, Yellowstone, Disneyland, Canada, and camping in the back yard!

7. Health! Christie is a great cook who cooks wholesome and delicious food for the family. We also love activities that keep us healthy like hiking, swimming, fishing, and sports. We believe in taking care of our bodies.

8. We are well educated in adoption/parenting issues. Doug has his bachelor's degree in Behavioral Science. Christie is a peer parent which means she is hired (occasionaly) to go into the homes of people in danger of having their children removed and help them with parenting skills.
9. This child will be taught that the only sure way to find joy is to love and serve other people. They will be taught not to judge. This is the number one rule in our family. We always take care of the underdog. We don't know people's past and so we don't judge them if they make different choices than we do. We never think that our way is right and every other way is wrong. We believe that everyone is on their own path back to our father in heaven and that we don't have to participate in behavior we don't agree with but we don't make judgment. We will teach them that "to love another person is to see the face of God."

10. Traditions! We have the MOST FUN family traditions in the world! From Valentines cookies for the whole neighborhood, to Christmas Eve service projects, WE LOVE TRADITIONS.

Still here...still waiting...

Adoption. What a process! We're still here.

Still waiting.

Still hoping.

Still praying.

We've had a couple of possibilities but nothing has been "it" yet. (This is a nice way of saying we've been rejected a couple of times. I tell myself that it's okay because when I hold MY baby, none of these disappointments will matter anymore. MY baby will end up in my arms.)

In the mean time, I pray for our birth mother every day.

And hope.

And love the children that I already have.

Loving them makes me look forward to loving the next one.

Which brings me back around to hoping.

That somewhere, sometime, somehow,

We'll be 5.

Favorite Family Pictures